Anger Management
I cracked open the Bible after several days of a packed schedule with numerous priorities on my plate; unfortunately, reading the Bible had been one of the last things on the plate. My emotions and untamed tongue had gotten me in trouble again and I found myself desperately searching God’s Word for understanding and wisdom. How did I get to be this ugly person with a sharp tongue that lashed out at the people closest to me?
Thinking about this last year, I began to see the pattern of my unchecked emotions and explosive anger that was causing more and more grief for my husband and my son. I tried to justify my emotions and eruptions with excuses of being a tired mother, not feeling secure about my career (or lack thereof), numerous friends moving far away, extended family drama, piles of dirty laundry or even marker stains on my son’s new t-shirt. I tried my best to include as many reasons as I could on my list of excuses thinking that somehow that would justify my rotten behavior…but it didn’t.
I’m so grateful that even in my foolishness and ignorance, God still wanted to extend love and grace to me. He showed me His Fatherly guidance in this scripture passage: “Make thankfulness your sacrifice to God, and keep the vows you made to the Most High. Then call on me when you are in trouble, and I will rescue you and you will give me glory” (Psalm 50:14-15 NLT).
Those two sentences opened my mind to the real reason behind my terrible behavior—I was angry with God for not answering a prayer I had been praying for the past year and a half; and because my anger was so deep, I had no room in my heart for gratefulness. It had been squeezed out of its rightful place in my heart by a larger, more demonstrative emotion that was now causing havoc in all areas of my life.
I went on to read the rest of Psalm 50 and it pretty much summed up my life right now—God despises people who pretend to love Him and obey Him, but in reality they only have wicked words and intentions; when we refuse God’s discipline, we treat His words like trash; and when we slander people around us expecting God to hear our prayers, He only wants to rebuke us for our filthy tongues and hearts. Ouch!
Eureka! God showed me the anecdote to my anger—gratefulness. Psalm 50:23 says, “But giving thanks is a sacrifice that truly honors me. If you keep to my path, I will reveal to you the salvation of God.”
That was it. I forgot to be grateful for all the good things God had given me. I had been so focused on my unanswered prayer that I had failed to see the countless prayers He had answered every single day.
Today, I pray that I will focus more on God’s face than on His hand, more on His love and generosity than on His timing. He is perfect and in total control over the universe, so why should I try to control my “universe” by getting upset. So, when I feel out of control, which will probably happen sometime today, I want to make sure I breathe for a few seconds before responding and remind myself of God’s countless blessings in my life. The best method for anger management is gratefulness.
